Tuesday 10 May 2011

Here Piggy, Piggy!


Today's post is a little off topic. It's not about writing per say, though it can be applied to writing. What it is, well, it's personal.

It baffles me no end that people feel the need to comment on the physical appearance of others in a negative way. Sometimes in a downright rude way.

Haven't they heard of the old adage: If you haven't got anything nice to say, shut your trap?

Obviously not.

Honestly, do they ever stop for a second to THINK about how they would feel if someone made a rude comment about them? Or to consider that perhaps that person might have a REASON for whatever it is the mocker finds so offensive?

Again, obviously not.

Today on the bus a woman made oinking noises at me. Seriously. A grown adult woman oinked at me like a pig. She obviously thought she was incredibly clever.

I wasn't offended. I was too gob smacked to do anything but stare in utter surprise. I expect such things from children or teenagers, but adults? I mean, it's so ridiculously stupid.

Grunting like a pig. That's the BEST you can do?

The interesting thing is that even a year ago, I would have been upset by this. Devastated, depressed and probably buried head first in a bucket of Ben and Jerry's. But I've grown thicker skin and got more comfortable in it. These things no longer have the power to send me into a tailspin of self loathing.

Now I feel irritated, bemused, and somewhat amused in a "lady you're a moron" kind of way. Because seriously, that's what she is. A rude, unthinking moron.

And I'm pretty sure she got the memo, because I gave her nothing but A Look. And baby, that sobered her up FAST.

Two lessons.

First, never ever assume you know why a person looks they way they look. Whether it's fat, skinny, tattooed, bald, multiply pierced, covered in acne, or wearing pajamas at the grocery store.

Second, never let the morons make you feel less. It's not about you. It's about them. If they were secure and happy in themselves and had one iota of sense, they'd never feel the need to comment about YOU.

You know who you are. Never let anyone tell you different.

And that brings me to our writing portion of the evening.

The same can be said about us as writers. There are plenty of people, and believe me I've met my share, who are going to try their hardest to put you down and make you feel inferior. Whether it's "You'll never make a living as a writer" or "Self-publishing isn't REAL publishing", they're going to do everything in their power to steer you from your goal.

Why?

Well, some of them just don't "get" it. Some of them are afraid. And some of them are just miserable gits. A good portion of them are miserable and unhappy in their own careers and lives because they, too, had a dream. One they let die and seeing you go for that dream reminds them of what they couldn't or wouldn't do.

The point remains, that whether we're talking about weight or writing:

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." - Eleanor Roosevelt

So, don't give them the satisfaction.

Head up. Boobs out. It's showtime!

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